An article on the Gannett Health Services website (affiliated with Cornell University) on the topic of “stress management” caught my attention. They admit that the story they use to illustrate their point is one that’s been shared in many places and the original source is unknown. They also point, correctly I think, it’s a story many resonate with.
The story is … A lecturer, when explaining stress management to a class, raised a glass of water and asked, “How heavy is this glass of water?” Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g. The lecturer replied, “The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it.”
“If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance. In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”
He continued, “And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on. As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the demands of life.”
So what burdens are you carrying today that you might need to “put down” for a while? I can’t help but think of 1 Peter 5:6-7 here: “Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.”
Back in 2005 I received an email that I think has some great “perspectives” that might help with handling whatever stressful situations we are facing. Maybe they will put a smile on your face and lighten your load just a bit. Here’s that sage advice:
> Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. (Maybe a little crass but truth nonetheless).
> Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. (This is one I’ve often remembered … after it was too late).
> Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
> Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
> Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
> Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. (Or sing, or walk in the rain. The poignant part of this sentence is the phrase “get up”. Too often the world has gotten us down!)
> Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late. (When you are young you had the ability to sleep late but never the time. The older you get, you have some time to sleep late, but can’t).
> The second mouse gets the cheese.
> When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
> Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
> You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
> We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.
> A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour. (In my life God is the author of my “detours” and if I get too consumed with the fact I’m not on the path I think I should be, I miss the scenery that the Lord wanted to point out in sending me on the detour in the first place).
I’ll be honest … right now is a pretty stressful period, and not just for me I’m sure. We face stressors at work, homes, school, with family and friends; stressors of all shapes and sizes. Here’s my list of practical things to help with stress.
1. Spend some time with the Lord. James 4:8 promises if we “draw near to God” that He will “draw near” to us.
2. Take your days off and all your vacation.
3. Ask yourself of all the things you are worried with today, how many will really matter 5 years from now.
4. Spend time with your family and friends. I have been at many bedsides as saints have passed from this life to the next and I have never once heard someone say, “I wish I’d spent more time at work!”
5. Count your blessings. The devil is really good at pointing out the things we “don’t have” but he blinds us to all of the blessings we do possess. Stop, look, and honestly examine how often you are blessed.
6. Did I say “spend time with the Lord?”
Knowing that no life is ever free of stress I’m praying for you (and me) that God will consistently give us proper perspective when life throws us a curve!
Sunday, July 8, 2012
Monday, June 25, 2012
Difficulties
Thom Rainer believes part of his calling as President of Lifeway Resources is to encourage pastors. He often blogs about issues that pastors face, and he typically “nails it” and I think that’s why so much of what he writes speaks to me. Today his post asked “What specific part of being a pastor is the most difficult for you? Here are my five tough challenges for pastors.” Here are the 5 things Rainer, who has pastored 4 churches of varying sizes, says present challenges to most pastors. The first five points are his but the comments are mine. I’ve added a few of my own “difficulties I face” at the end.
1. Responding graciously to someone right before you preach. I’ve often told the folks I pastor that I typically am not available before worship begins. I learned the hard way that the devil will use hallway conversations to get me “fired up” and on more than one occasion I found myself then preaching “in the flesh”. So knowing this tendency of mine I avoid conversations before worship begins as a safeguard to keeping my attitude right and staying in the Spirit.
2. Knowing what do with a staff member who is not making a vital contribution to the church. This is one of the toughest aspects of pastoring a multi-staff church, especially if your temperament leans toward conflict avoidance. Some pastors I’m sure have abused the power of the pastorate by letting staff members “go” when there was really no justification. As a result churches tend to make it very difficult for a pastor to deal with an unproductive or disloyal staff member. Unfortunately, the end result is that when the pastor can’t “take it anymore” he moves to a different ministry setting and the church ends up keeping the unproductive staff member. It ends up being a loss for everyone. The pastor leaves maybe before his work there was over. The church loses on many fronts. And the unproductive staff member loses because without accountability, there is no motivation to improve.
3. Loving a person in the church when that person is your critic. I know I want to be Christ-like and love people the way the Lord loves me … without conditions. These “critics” typically either throw stones anonymously so as to not have to take ownership of their comments. And the problem, at least for me, is that whether anonymous or not, criticism of the pastor often wounds the pastor’s family. This is the reason it’s hard to love those who are critics.
4. Preparing more than one quality sermon a week. For 19 years I prepared what I hoped were 3 quality sermons a week. The last year I have given over the Wednesday evening service to another staff member which has made it somewhat easier to prepare messages. But there’s the constant tension of making sure your sermons are constantly improving.
5. Doing the funeral of a person who was not a Christian. There have been times families wanted me to preach their loved one into heaven. I will often ask family members if their loved one was a Christian and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “I don’t know”. But the amazing thing is the number of times they don’t know because they never asked or shared the gospel.
6. Balancing the tension of being “available” to everyone and being “available” to no one. When I am available to everyone, those are the times my availability to God suffers. So some pastor friends allow the pendulum to swing too far in the other direction and they are available to no one. Thank God for great ministry assistants that protect their pastors time.
7. Knowing when to be “real” and to whom to be “real”. Most pastors know the heartache of being burned by a trusted friend. Jesus was burned by Judas. I’m not saying that all who at some point turn on their pastor / friend are “judases” … just that it is difficult knowing when someone can take my being real with them. We pastors often try, many times because of the high expectations for the office, try and maintain a pretense of spirituality. Unfortunately that keeps most friendships shallow and pastors dealing with the frustration of loneliness.
I’m sure this list crosses over to the laity as well. I’d love to hear what issues / frustrations you deal with on a regular basis. There is something cathartic about being able to put them down and take ownership of these feelings. Thanks for reading my blog.
1. Responding graciously to someone right before you preach. I’ve often told the folks I pastor that I typically am not available before worship begins. I learned the hard way that the devil will use hallway conversations to get me “fired up” and on more than one occasion I found myself then preaching “in the flesh”. So knowing this tendency of mine I avoid conversations before worship begins as a safeguard to keeping my attitude right and staying in the Spirit.
2. Knowing what do with a staff member who is not making a vital contribution to the church. This is one of the toughest aspects of pastoring a multi-staff church, especially if your temperament leans toward conflict avoidance. Some pastors I’m sure have abused the power of the pastorate by letting staff members “go” when there was really no justification. As a result churches tend to make it very difficult for a pastor to deal with an unproductive or disloyal staff member. Unfortunately, the end result is that when the pastor can’t “take it anymore” he moves to a different ministry setting and the church ends up keeping the unproductive staff member. It ends up being a loss for everyone. The pastor leaves maybe before his work there was over. The church loses on many fronts. And the unproductive staff member loses because without accountability, there is no motivation to improve.
3. Loving a person in the church when that person is your critic. I know I want to be Christ-like and love people the way the Lord loves me … without conditions. These “critics” typically either throw stones anonymously so as to not have to take ownership of their comments. And the problem, at least for me, is that whether anonymous or not, criticism of the pastor often wounds the pastor’s family. This is the reason it’s hard to love those who are critics.
4. Preparing more than one quality sermon a week. For 19 years I prepared what I hoped were 3 quality sermons a week. The last year I have given over the Wednesday evening service to another staff member which has made it somewhat easier to prepare messages. But there’s the constant tension of making sure your sermons are constantly improving.
5. Doing the funeral of a person who was not a Christian. There have been times families wanted me to preach their loved one into heaven. I will often ask family members if their loved one was a Christian and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “I don’t know”. But the amazing thing is the number of times they don’t know because they never asked or shared the gospel.
6. Balancing the tension of being “available” to everyone and being “available” to no one. When I am available to everyone, those are the times my availability to God suffers. So some pastor friends allow the pendulum to swing too far in the other direction and they are available to no one. Thank God for great ministry assistants that protect their pastors time.
7. Knowing when to be “real” and to whom to be “real”. Most pastors know the heartache of being burned by a trusted friend. Jesus was burned by Judas. I’m not saying that all who at some point turn on their pastor / friend are “judases” … just that it is difficult knowing when someone can take my being real with them. We pastors often try, many times because of the high expectations for the office, try and maintain a pretense of spirituality. Unfortunately that keeps most friendships shallow and pastors dealing with the frustration of loneliness.
I’m sure this list crosses over to the laity as well. I’d love to hear what issues / frustrations you deal with on a regular basis. There is something cathartic about being able to put them down and take ownership of these feelings. Thanks for reading my blog.
Monday, June 11, 2012
25 fun things to ponder
1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is whack?
6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?
7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?
8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?
9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?
10. Why are they called " stands" when they are made for sitting?
11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?
12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?
13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?
14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?
15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?
16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
20. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?
21. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?
22. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
23. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
24. Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?
25. Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
So what are your favorite "ponderings"?
2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is whack?
6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?
7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?
8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?
9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?
10. Why are they called " stands" when they are made for sitting?
11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?
12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?
13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?
14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?
15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?
16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
20. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?
21. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?
22. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
23. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
24. Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?
25. Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
So what are your favorite "ponderings"?
Sunday, June 10, 2012
"Dangerous people"
I was reading a really good article today on www.churchleaders.com entitled: “Do you know the most dangerous person in your church?” It reminded me of a sermon I preached in February of 2009 entitled “The most dangerous people in the church”. I thought I’d summarize the points the Nebraska church planter made in his article today, then write about the text and points I had in my sermon.
Erik Raymond is the Omaha church planter that penned the article. He makes the case that this “dangerous” person is not who we’d immediately think of. He says it’s not the: unbeliever who doesn’t know the church language, or the Christian who is what he calls doctrinally anemic, or even the “Arminian sniffed out by the Calvinist in 20 seconds flat". In his estimation the most dangerous person in church is the seemingly smart bible guy who is “unteachable”; the guy who might say “Don’t confuse me with the facts, I know what I believe.” Like when my friend Phil Hoskins at his church, Higher Ground Baptist Church in Kingsport, Tn had a large issue before the church and he started speaking to what the bible might say about the issue before them. A man stood up and said something to the effect, “Preacher, we all know you know lots more about the bible than us, so don’t go bringing the bible into it!”
Raymond then gives some “signs” about why this guy (or gal) is dangerous. First, they are dangerous because he is “gospel-eclipsing” meaning he has it all figured out. Whereas the gospel calls us to continue to grow in our understanding, this guy has all the answers before the questions are asked. Second, he’s dangerous because he is “critical”. He likes to Monday morning quarterback (2nd guess) every sermon and decision made by leadership. Third, he is dangerous because his attitude of unteachableness is ultimately divisive. Fourth, he’s dangerous because in his being unteachable and constantly second-guessing leadership he robs leaders of joy (See Hebrews 13:7, 10). The fifth reason he’s dangerous is because he’s a “time waster”. Raymond says he takes the time of the staff wanting to argue what he considers the “finer points” of the gospel message and mandate.
Raymond then gives some very practical advice on how to deal with people like this. He states:
1. Pray for him
2. Minimize his influence
3. Watch him and the sheep – care for him spiritually but be keenly aware of the sheep at large and how he might influence them
4. Lovingly aim to teach him
5. Confront him when necessary
In my sermon I used Matthew 13 where the Lord gives the parable of the “wheat and tares” (weeds). I found the text fell into 4 easy points.
First, where do they come from. Jesus, in verse 39, clearly says the enemy who “sowed them” is the “devil”. Jesus said he sows weeds among the weed to destroy the crop. In Ephesians 6, the Apostle Paul reminds us that are battle is not against “flesh and blood” but rather the enemy is Satan.
Second, I looked at who are the dangerous folk. They in all likelihood are some of the most “religious” among the group. The have religion but not a relationship. Membership but do not know the Master. As Paul said to Timothy, they have “a form of godliness but deny the power thereof.” In other words they are religious, love to be in church on Sundays with their bibles under arm, but are lost. This can be true of laymen and leader alike. I honestly believe at one point I hired a member of my staff at a previous church, that later, by his attitude and actions revealed he was lost.
Third, I considered what their mission might be. Jesus said the devil comes to “steal, kill and destroy” (John 10:10). These folks are being used by the enemy to trip up and tear down. Given time, the weeds will always reveal their true nature.
The fourth thing I pointed out that the text explained was where they work. Jesus said the enemy came “at night” to plant the weed seeds. The devil will always try and take the path of least resistance. He doesn’t want a fight but rather to divide and conquer.
I then concluded with the same thought I want to finish this blog with, namely where should we expect Satan to do his most damaging work. One of the attributes that God has that Satan does not is His omnipresence; God is all places at all times. Satan though has to pick and choose where he will be. Having to pick where he will attack it makes sense to me that Satan will spend most of his time attacking churches that are alive and reaching people with the gospel. Why attack a “dead” church when you have them right where you want them? After all, it’s best to let a sleeping dog lie, right?
The real tragedy of the parable is that in Jesus’ account the tares never have their nature changed to that of wheat. The good news today is that anyone who has the nature of a weed, while there’s still life flowing through their body can be changed by the grace of God and receive a new nature, John 3 Jesus called it being “born-again”.
Erik Raymond is the Omaha church planter that penned the article. He makes the case that this “dangerous” person is not who we’d immediately think of. He says it’s not the: unbeliever who doesn’t know the church language, or the Christian who is what he calls doctrinally anemic, or even the “Arminian sniffed out by the Calvinist in 20 seconds flat". In his estimation the most dangerous person in church is the seemingly smart bible guy who is “unteachable”; the guy who might say “Don’t confuse me with the facts, I know what I believe.” Like when my friend Phil Hoskins at his church, Higher Ground Baptist Church in Kingsport, Tn had a large issue before the church and he started speaking to what the bible might say about the issue before them. A man stood up and said something to the effect, “Preacher, we all know you know lots more about the bible than us, so don’t go bringing the bible into it!”
Raymond then gives some “signs” about why this guy (or gal) is dangerous. First, they are dangerous because he is “gospel-eclipsing” meaning he has it all figured out. Whereas the gospel calls us to continue to grow in our understanding, this guy has all the answers before the questions are asked. Second, he’s dangerous because he is “critical”. He likes to Monday morning quarterback (2nd guess) every sermon and decision made by leadership. Third, he is dangerous because his attitude of unteachableness is ultimately divisive. Fourth, he’s dangerous because in his being unteachable and constantly second-guessing leadership he robs leaders of joy (See Hebrews 13:7, 10). The fifth reason he’s dangerous is because he’s a “time waster”. Raymond says he takes the time of the staff wanting to argue what he considers the “finer points” of the gospel message and mandate.
Raymond then gives some very practical advice on how to deal with people like this. He states:
1. Pray for him
2. Minimize his influence
3. Watch him and the sheep – care for him spiritually but be keenly aware of the sheep at large and how he might influence them
4. Lovingly aim to teach him
5. Confront him when necessary
In my sermon I used Matthew 13 where the Lord gives the parable of the “wheat and tares” (weeds). I found the text fell into 4 easy points.
First, where do they come from. Jesus, in verse 39, clearly says the enemy who “sowed them” is the “devil”. Jesus said he sows weeds among the weed to destroy the crop. In Ephesians 6, the Apostle Paul reminds us that are battle is not against “flesh and blood” but rather the enemy is Satan.
Second, I looked at who are the dangerous folk. They in all likelihood are some of the most “religious” among the group. The have religion but not a relationship. Membership but do not know the Master. As Paul said to Timothy, they have “a form of godliness but deny the power thereof.” In other words they are religious, love to be in church on Sundays with their bibles under arm, but are lost. This can be true of laymen and leader alike. I honestly believe at one point I hired a member of my staff at a previous church, that later, by his attitude and actions revealed he was lost.
Third, I considered what their mission might be. Jesus said the devil comes to “steal, kill and destroy” (John 10:10). These folks are being used by the enemy to trip up and tear down. Given time, the weeds will always reveal their true nature.
The fourth thing I pointed out that the text explained was where they work. Jesus said the enemy came “at night” to plant the weed seeds. The devil will always try and take the path of least resistance. He doesn’t want a fight but rather to divide and conquer.
I then concluded with the same thought I want to finish this blog with, namely where should we expect Satan to do his most damaging work. One of the attributes that God has that Satan does not is His omnipresence; God is all places at all times. Satan though has to pick and choose where he will be. Having to pick where he will attack it makes sense to me that Satan will spend most of his time attacking churches that are alive and reaching people with the gospel. Why attack a “dead” church when you have them right where you want them? After all, it’s best to let a sleeping dog lie, right?
The real tragedy of the parable is that in Jesus’ account the tares never have their nature changed to that of wheat. The good news today is that anyone who has the nature of a weed, while there’s still life flowing through their body can be changed by the grace of God and receive a new nature, John 3 Jesus called it being “born-again”.
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Secrets Pastors Keep
Thom Rainer in The Christian Post wrote an article entitled “5 Secrets Pastors Refuse To Tell”. This struck a chord with me. Through 21 years of pastoring I’ve heard horror stories and even lived a few myself. There’s the pastor that is very successful in that his church has multiplied through his years of ministry there and in his denomination he’s called a success story. But then if you get inside the façade you hear of feelings of depression and feelings of “What else can I do to earn a living?” That is a question I’ve heard often through the years, “I’d do something else if I only knew how I could support my family”. Sad … but true.
I read today of another pastor who for years kept this secret well; the secret pain he felt, until it became too much to bear. He decided to leave the ministry without a plan. I Heard of another pastor who spoke about fantasizing of how he could get kicked-out of the ministry, without losing his wife, or going to jail. It was then he made his plan to step aside...instead of running. Now to some of the pastors that reads this, I’m sure there will be a little “Been there, felt that” … even if the feeling or thought was only fleeting. To the layman who reads this, you are probably scratching your head thinking “What in the world?” Layman, let me caution you about being too quick to judge these feelings from your pastors, as they are but mere fallible humans as are we all. Pastors keep their secrets for a couple of reasons. One, the fear their ministry will be hurt in the eyes of those they serve with. Or two, as I have experienced on occasion, some laymen just aren’t ready to accept that their pastors have serious “personal issues” they deal with as well.
So what are the 5 “secrets” Rainer says pastors keep? I’m glad you asked. Here they are with some of his comments and my thoughts.
1. “My marriage is struggling” – I’d add to this “My children are not perfect”. I think there is this need in congregations to for whatever reason hold their minister’s family to a higher standard than everyone else. It’s that “fishbowl” pastors often speak about. I remember one time about 15 years ago my daughter was just being a kid one day at church and an older layman made some statement like, “She ought to know better, she’s the pastors’ daughter”. It was something silly like running in church. I made sure he understood that he needed to give my child the same grace he gave to other kids … grace to simply “be kids”. Rainer says, “Pastors' wives sometimes wonder if their husbands are married to them or to the church. Resentment and marital fights are not uncommon.”
2. “I fear my kids will grow up hating the church” – Our children, as much as we try to shelter them, are often exposed to the “dark side” of church life. They see and hear things that they shouldn’t, maybe said about their mother or father, in a hallway or business meeting. And it is a very real fear pastors have that their kid’s years later will hold all churches / Christians accountable for the hurt they feel.
3. “I let a handful of critics control me” – I recently told our congregation a story about a man who ordered a million frogs and had them shipped to him. When the box arrived, he counted and there were only 500 inside. When he called the company to complain the salesman said, “I’m sorry, but when they were croaking they sounded like a million.” It doesn’t take but a few “vocal croaks” to make life miserable. The sad thing is, often the vast majority love and support their pastor, yet they are not vocal in their support. I thank God for those encouragers He has placed in my life throughout the years.
4. “I often have anger toward the supportive church members who don't defend me to my critics” – I often tell the story of the deacon at my 1st church that in a deacon’s meeting one night poked me in the chest in front of 5 other deacons, and said, “Preacher, if you want to take this out to the parking lot we can settle this right now”. That hurt! But what hurt worse was the fact the other 5 men sat there silently and let him do it.
5. “I’ve thought about quitting several times” – Almost every pastor I know, that I’ve had a relationship with where we could be honest with one another has experienced and expressed this feeling somewhere along the way. As Rainer points out these pastors confess, “The only thing that has stopped me from quitting is the call of God.”
I’m sure pastors could add to this list of 5 things some things they feel they are unable to share for whatever reason. Pastoring is a tough job; it’s not for the faint of heart. Thanks for taking the time to read my blog and for doing what I know you will do … praying for your pastor.
I read today of another pastor who for years kept this secret well; the secret pain he felt, until it became too much to bear. He decided to leave the ministry without a plan. I Heard of another pastor who spoke about fantasizing of how he could get kicked-out of the ministry, without losing his wife, or going to jail. It was then he made his plan to step aside...instead of running. Now to some of the pastors that reads this, I’m sure there will be a little “Been there, felt that” … even if the feeling or thought was only fleeting. To the layman who reads this, you are probably scratching your head thinking “What in the world?” Layman, let me caution you about being too quick to judge these feelings from your pastors, as they are but mere fallible humans as are we all. Pastors keep their secrets for a couple of reasons. One, the fear their ministry will be hurt in the eyes of those they serve with. Or two, as I have experienced on occasion, some laymen just aren’t ready to accept that their pastors have serious “personal issues” they deal with as well.
So what are the 5 “secrets” Rainer says pastors keep? I’m glad you asked. Here they are with some of his comments and my thoughts.
1. “My marriage is struggling” – I’d add to this “My children are not perfect”. I think there is this need in congregations to for whatever reason hold their minister’s family to a higher standard than everyone else. It’s that “fishbowl” pastors often speak about. I remember one time about 15 years ago my daughter was just being a kid one day at church and an older layman made some statement like, “She ought to know better, she’s the pastors’ daughter”. It was something silly like running in church. I made sure he understood that he needed to give my child the same grace he gave to other kids … grace to simply “be kids”. Rainer says, “Pastors' wives sometimes wonder if their husbands are married to them or to the church. Resentment and marital fights are not uncommon.”
2. “I fear my kids will grow up hating the church” – Our children, as much as we try to shelter them, are often exposed to the “dark side” of church life. They see and hear things that they shouldn’t, maybe said about their mother or father, in a hallway or business meeting. And it is a very real fear pastors have that their kid’s years later will hold all churches / Christians accountable for the hurt they feel.
3. “I let a handful of critics control me” – I recently told our congregation a story about a man who ordered a million frogs and had them shipped to him. When the box arrived, he counted and there were only 500 inside. When he called the company to complain the salesman said, “I’m sorry, but when they were croaking they sounded like a million.” It doesn’t take but a few “vocal croaks” to make life miserable. The sad thing is, often the vast majority love and support their pastor, yet they are not vocal in their support. I thank God for those encouragers He has placed in my life throughout the years.
4. “I often have anger toward the supportive church members who don't defend me to my critics” – I often tell the story of the deacon at my 1st church that in a deacon’s meeting one night poked me in the chest in front of 5 other deacons, and said, “Preacher, if you want to take this out to the parking lot we can settle this right now”. That hurt! But what hurt worse was the fact the other 5 men sat there silently and let him do it.
5. “I’ve thought about quitting several times” – Almost every pastor I know, that I’ve had a relationship with where we could be honest with one another has experienced and expressed this feeling somewhere along the way. As Rainer points out these pastors confess, “The only thing that has stopped me from quitting is the call of God.”
I’m sure pastors could add to this list of 5 things some things they feel they are unable to share for whatever reason. Pastoring is a tough job; it’s not for the faint of heart. Thanks for taking the time to read my blog and for doing what I know you will do … praying for your pastor.
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Leading by faith ...
Vision is defined at www.dictionary.com as “something seen or otherwise perceived”. Tonight we share a vision for a new ministry paradigm at Eastwood that will hopefully allow us to maximize making disciples, capture on a regular basis the excitement that comes when our two campuses come together, and reach more people for Christ. I recognize this is a Baptist Church and “change” for many is a four-letter word; change typically does not come quickly or without great consternation. But for too long I think leaders of the church have abdicated their responsibility to lead, primarily out of fear of the “backlash” they might face for leading courageously. I want to share some principles of leadership that I think will help a church, any church, if the leaders will follow them go forward.
1. Ask God to make you passionate about what you do and believe to be true – often I think pastors see role in the church as a job to fulfill rather than a calling of His will to follow. We should be like Jeremiah in Jeremiah 20:9 “But if I say, ‘I will not mention His word or speak anymore in His name,’ His word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot.”
2. Lead out of conviction not comfort – there are times that doing what is “right” and what is “easy” are mutually exclusive. As leaders, we should never lead with the motivation to gain the applause or appreciation of man. Paul said in Galatians 1:10 “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” (NIV). Proverbs 29:25 puts it this way, “Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe.” (NIV).
3. Believe it’s unnecessary to have all the “answers” before you obey God’s will – Abraham would be buried today in Ur of the Chaldees had he decided to wait until he had all the answers to follow the Lord. To walk by faith we must first live by faith. I absolutely love Hebrews chapter 11. To look at the long list of people who lived lives of faith and faithfulness. There are two verses at the beginning of the chapter that speak so well to this. Verse 1, “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen”. And verse 6, “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.”
4. Pray bold prayers for the people you pastor – Time and again we find the church in Acts praying prayers of great boldness. Today we pray prayers of safety. “Lord, please don’t upset the way things are going right now; it’s all running like clockwork”. There’s a lot of churches He needs to “upset the way things are going” as I believe He is upset at how they are going. The early church prayed for conversions whereas we pray for comfort and contentment. We ought to pray to God asking for things that we believe to be His will, that unless He shows up and accomplishes it, it will not happen. This ensures that when it does happen, He gets the glory. As William Carey, the father of the modern day missions movement said, we should “Expect great things from God, attempt great things for God”!
5. See people through the eyes of God – it’s a constant battle to see people the way the Lord sees them, through eyes of love and compassion not condemnation and judgment. This principle alone, if realized, would radically change most churches for the better.
6. Stop trying to be _______ church – God has uniquely gifted and called the people you lead for the time and place you are at. We don’t have to try what’s working someplace else to see if it will "work" here. We simply have to get hold of the heart of God and not let go.
I’m praying that I will be a pastor of faith that leads a people of faith.
1. Ask God to make you passionate about what you do and believe to be true – often I think pastors see role in the church as a job to fulfill rather than a calling of His will to follow. We should be like Jeremiah in Jeremiah 20:9 “But if I say, ‘I will not mention His word or speak anymore in His name,’ His word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot.”
2. Lead out of conviction not comfort – there are times that doing what is “right” and what is “easy” are mutually exclusive. As leaders, we should never lead with the motivation to gain the applause or appreciation of man. Paul said in Galatians 1:10 “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” (NIV). Proverbs 29:25 puts it this way, “Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe.” (NIV).
3. Believe it’s unnecessary to have all the “answers” before you obey God’s will – Abraham would be buried today in Ur of the Chaldees had he decided to wait until he had all the answers to follow the Lord. To walk by faith we must first live by faith. I absolutely love Hebrews chapter 11. To look at the long list of people who lived lives of faith and faithfulness. There are two verses at the beginning of the chapter that speak so well to this. Verse 1, “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen”. And verse 6, “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.”
4. Pray bold prayers for the people you pastor – Time and again we find the church in Acts praying prayers of great boldness. Today we pray prayers of safety. “Lord, please don’t upset the way things are going right now; it’s all running like clockwork”. There’s a lot of churches He needs to “upset the way things are going” as I believe He is upset at how they are going. The early church prayed for conversions whereas we pray for comfort and contentment. We ought to pray to God asking for things that we believe to be His will, that unless He shows up and accomplishes it, it will not happen. This ensures that when it does happen, He gets the glory. As William Carey, the father of the modern day missions movement said, we should “Expect great things from God, attempt great things for God”!
5. See people through the eyes of God – it’s a constant battle to see people the way the Lord sees them, through eyes of love and compassion not condemnation and judgment. This principle alone, if realized, would radically change most churches for the better.
6. Stop trying to be _______ church – God has uniquely gifted and called the people you lead for the time and place you are at. We don’t have to try what’s working someplace else to see if it will "work" here. We simply have to get hold of the heart of God and not let go.
I’m praying that I will be a pastor of faith that leads a people of faith.
Monday, May 21, 2012
Inward or outward focused church?
On www.churchleaders.com Thom Rainer has a very insightful article that because of my job as a pastor, the title caught my attention. In case you don’t know Dr. Rainer is President of Lifeway, which among other things is the publishing arm of the Southern Baptist Convention. He is also one of the premier researchers for churches of all denominations as well as prolific author. The article is entitled “10 Warning Signs of an Inwardly Obsessed Church”. So I decided I’d read the article and see where we (Eastwood Baptist in Bowling Green) are in regards to being inwardly or outwardly focused using his criteria. So here are his 10 warning signs with my comments about Eastwood after.
1. Worship wars – The direction of Eastwood worship was set before I arrived. I think maybe there was a good bit of angst as Eastwood transitioned to a more blended toward the contemporary format but our worship pastor is great about trying to blend in hymns and other styles of music.
2. Prolonged Minutia Meetings – Eastwood only has 3 standing committees (a record for Southern Baptists I believe) and 5 minute business meetings so we are doing great here.
3. Facility Focus – Rainer defines this as “One of the highest priorities in the church is the protection and preservation of rooms, furniture, and other visible parts of the church’s buildings and grounds.” While Eastwood does not meet this definition I think we need to be careful as think about a building for our Plano Campus; it would be easy to take the focus off of reaching people.
4. Program Driven – No church will ever be completely free of “programming” but the point Dr. Rainer makes is that we can’t let the program be the ends rather than the means. For instance we can’t make Bible Study Fellowship classes just about studying the bible. They have to be a door we use to reach people for Christ. Bible study fellowship classes are the means by which this is done.
5. Inwardly Focused Budget – I think we are doing great here. Eastwood was in the Top 10 Churches in the Kentucky Baptist Convention in both total gifts as well as per-capita gifts to the Co-Operative Program. About 20% of what is received this year will go to missions. I received notice last week that out of 40,000 plus SBC churches, Eastwood was in the top 50 in gifts to the Annie Armstrong Easter Offering for North American missions.
6. Inordinate Demands For Pastoral Care – Rainer defines this as having “unreasonable demands” for pastoral care. I am blessed with a great staff, which loves to minister to the people of the church.
7. Attitudes of Entitlement – From the most active to the least active I simply don’t sense this attitude of “deserving special treatment”. I’m sure not all pastors can say this, but I’m blessed here at EBC.
8. Greater Concern About Change than the Gospel – Eastwood is incredible in adapting to and embracing change. If the membership believes change will possibly produce a more effective way to reach people for Christ and disciple believers, they have willingly embraced changed in my 7 ½ years as their pastor.
9. Anger and Hostility – I told someone last week that after 7 ½ years I honestly don’t know anyone who is angry with me or the church necessarily. Oh, I’m sure there are some out there but I’ve only reached this length tenure one other time, and by then while the mood was still generally sweet, I knew who was throwing rocks and when to duck.
10. Evangelistic Apathy – Uh oh! I think this could be a major issue for Eastwood. We are strong in giving to missions and even going. Where I think we struggle is in inviting our lost, unchurched, or dechurched friends to church or even sharing the gospel with them ourselves. We have loads of guests each week but I’m not sure how many of them have intentionally been reached by our folks and how many of them are without Christ.
All in all I think we are doing great as far as keeping the focus on where it needs to be; on those outside the church. The church is the only organization that I know of that exists to a large part for those outside of the membership. Now I know some of my brothers might take issue with that statement and tell me “No, the primary purpose of the church is to make disciples and give God the glory He is due.” But I believe we have to reach people with the gospel before we can disciple them, and the more people we reach, the more the Father is glorified. Just my thoughts…
Bro Tom
1. Worship wars – The direction of Eastwood worship was set before I arrived. I think maybe there was a good bit of angst as Eastwood transitioned to a more blended toward the contemporary format but our worship pastor is great about trying to blend in hymns and other styles of music.
2. Prolonged Minutia Meetings – Eastwood only has 3 standing committees (a record for Southern Baptists I believe) and 5 minute business meetings so we are doing great here.
3. Facility Focus – Rainer defines this as “One of the highest priorities in the church is the protection and preservation of rooms, furniture, and other visible parts of the church’s buildings and grounds.” While Eastwood does not meet this definition I think we need to be careful as think about a building for our Plano Campus; it would be easy to take the focus off of reaching people.
4. Program Driven – No church will ever be completely free of “programming” but the point Dr. Rainer makes is that we can’t let the program be the ends rather than the means. For instance we can’t make Bible Study Fellowship classes just about studying the bible. They have to be a door we use to reach people for Christ. Bible study fellowship classes are the means by which this is done.
5. Inwardly Focused Budget – I think we are doing great here. Eastwood was in the Top 10 Churches in the Kentucky Baptist Convention in both total gifts as well as per-capita gifts to the Co-Operative Program. About 20% of what is received this year will go to missions. I received notice last week that out of 40,000 plus SBC churches, Eastwood was in the top 50 in gifts to the Annie Armstrong Easter Offering for North American missions.
6. Inordinate Demands For Pastoral Care – Rainer defines this as having “unreasonable demands” for pastoral care. I am blessed with a great staff, which loves to minister to the people of the church.
7. Attitudes of Entitlement – From the most active to the least active I simply don’t sense this attitude of “deserving special treatment”. I’m sure not all pastors can say this, but I’m blessed here at EBC.
8. Greater Concern About Change than the Gospel – Eastwood is incredible in adapting to and embracing change. If the membership believes change will possibly produce a more effective way to reach people for Christ and disciple believers, they have willingly embraced changed in my 7 ½ years as their pastor.
9. Anger and Hostility – I told someone last week that after 7 ½ years I honestly don’t know anyone who is angry with me or the church necessarily. Oh, I’m sure there are some out there but I’ve only reached this length tenure one other time, and by then while the mood was still generally sweet, I knew who was throwing rocks and when to duck.
10. Evangelistic Apathy – Uh oh! I think this could be a major issue for Eastwood. We are strong in giving to missions and even going. Where I think we struggle is in inviting our lost, unchurched, or dechurched friends to church or even sharing the gospel with them ourselves. We have loads of guests each week but I’m not sure how many of them have intentionally been reached by our folks and how many of them are without Christ.
All in all I think we are doing great as far as keeping the focus on where it needs to be; on those outside the church. The church is the only organization that I know of that exists to a large part for those outside of the membership. Now I know some of my brothers might take issue with that statement and tell me “No, the primary purpose of the church is to make disciples and give God the glory He is due.” But I believe we have to reach people with the gospel before we can disciple them, and the more people we reach, the more the Father is glorified. Just my thoughts…
Bro Tom
Monday, May 7, 2012
"Normal" pastors
I like to read a blog by a fellow named Ron Edmondson, who Sunday was elected the new senior pastor of Immanuel Baptist church in Lexington. He really has a heart for encouraging pastors and his blog posts often reflect that. I think he uniquely understands some of the as he says “pressures, frustrations, and joys” of serving as a senior pastor because he has walked in those shoes. He recently shared a post entitled “10 ‘secrets’ about many senior pastors” that I wanted to share on my blog. While I don’t know how many pastors read my blogs I know many laymen and women do, and just maybe this will help them understand their pastor a little better. I am putting quotation marks around what he says then adding some comments of my own.
Here are 10 “secrets” about many senior pastors:
1. “Leading from this position is overwhelming at times. We know Christ is ultimately in charge, but we also know it often seems everyone looks to us to have all the answers.” While I’m not sure if this pressure is applied by others, if it’s of pastors own making, or just something inherent in the job, I do think this is very real, at least for the pastors I know.
2. “People tell the senior pastor all kinds of things about what is happening in their life or in the lives of others…many we would rather not know sometimes…and sometimes the weight of others problems we carry is enormous.” There is no way for a pastor to get around this. A large part of ministry is tending the sheep that the Lord allows you to serve. This means knowing when they stray, when they are hurt, when they are absent from the flock, etc…
3. “Most pastors walk with a degree of uncertainty, which keeps us in prayer, but also makes us question our abilities at times. It makes depression common for many senior pastors. (Need a Biblical example…see 1 Kings 19)”. I know firsthand that this is real. There are days that I question, ‘Lord, am I really equipped to do this?’ I usually get the answer that no I am not, but He in me is able to do more than I could think or ask.
4. “Many senior pastors fear the possibility of failing in their role, so they thrive on the encouragement and prayers of others.” This is not unique to pastors as I think we all need encouragement. But the weight of being a spiritual overseer of souls is enormous and encouragement always helps to lighten that load. Just today I received an email letting me know how yesterday’s message spoke to her. Little things like that are such a blessing to pastors.
5. “Sometimes we allow insecurity to cause us to become overprotective of our reputation and our position.” I believe this is tied to #4 above. Because there is this real fear of failure, whether it’s failing God or His people, insecurity has a way of creeping into the man of God’s life. Moses would be a prime example of this. God called him to a task that he didn’t think he could fulfill, and so with a fear of failure he expressed his insecurities to God.
6. “We face the same temptations and occasional spiritual dryness as everyone else. This means we need accountability, but are often afraid to seek it.” The prayers of God’s people help during these times of dryness. I think it often is acutely obvious to both pastor and people when this is going on. And when it is, the people of God praying for the man of God can help overcome this.
7. “Our spouse is sometimes the loneliest person in the church and often feels extreme pressure to live up to unrealistic expectations.” While I can’t speak directly to this having never been the “spouse of a pastor” I do know the pressures are real. I’m grateful to serve a people who have placed no expectations on my wife other than to be my wife and the mother of our kids!
8. “Loneliness can exist for all leaders and many pastors suffer from it.” In my own discussions with other pastors I believe this is true though we seldom own up to it. Many pastors have this real fear of showing any weakness in their spiritual armor. So rather than be transparent about feelings of loneliness, pastors get used to the façade of “I’m okay, thanks for asking.”
9. “We seldom know who we can trust, which is why we become guarded and appear hard to get to know. Most senior pastors have been burned by someone they once trusted.” Man is this ever true. I’m thinking of a time when a staff member (at another church) betrayed my trust just weeks after arriving at our church. This lead to my best friend in the church, a man I’d spent countless hours with at his house, our house, the golf course, etc… leaving the church over this. For several years our friendship was not what it should have been, in fact it never got back to where it was.
10. “We suspect the staff, church leaders and congregation sometimes talks about us behind our back.” This is just human nature I suppose... both to suspect that folks talk about you as well as others. I know “roasted preacher” is served often around Baptist tables on Sunday … but to be honest, when pastors get together we’ve been known to eat a little “roasted layman” on occasion (grin).
Granted, Ron makes the point that not every pastor faces all 10 of these. He also rightfully expresses how we senior pastors find great joy in our work. He makes a point at the end of his post that is worth repeating word for word … here it is: “When I share any post like this, however, I have come to expect a lecture on the need to depend on Christ for these issues, which only further demonstrates my points. Senior pastors are to fully rely on Christ’s strength, as is every other believer. This is just a reminder that we happen to also be like Elijah… ‘a man just like us’.” (James 5:17)
Here are 10 “secrets” about many senior pastors:
1. “Leading from this position is overwhelming at times. We know Christ is ultimately in charge, but we also know it often seems everyone looks to us to have all the answers.” While I’m not sure if this pressure is applied by others, if it’s of pastors own making, or just something inherent in the job, I do think this is very real, at least for the pastors I know.
2. “People tell the senior pastor all kinds of things about what is happening in their life or in the lives of others…many we would rather not know sometimes…and sometimes the weight of others problems we carry is enormous.” There is no way for a pastor to get around this. A large part of ministry is tending the sheep that the Lord allows you to serve. This means knowing when they stray, when they are hurt, when they are absent from the flock, etc…
3. “Most pastors walk with a degree of uncertainty, which keeps us in prayer, but also makes us question our abilities at times. It makes depression common for many senior pastors. (Need a Biblical example…see 1 Kings 19)”. I know firsthand that this is real. There are days that I question, ‘Lord, am I really equipped to do this?’ I usually get the answer that no I am not, but He in me is able to do more than I could think or ask.
4. “Many senior pastors fear the possibility of failing in their role, so they thrive on the encouragement and prayers of others.” This is not unique to pastors as I think we all need encouragement. But the weight of being a spiritual overseer of souls is enormous and encouragement always helps to lighten that load. Just today I received an email letting me know how yesterday’s message spoke to her. Little things like that are such a blessing to pastors.
5. “Sometimes we allow insecurity to cause us to become overprotective of our reputation and our position.” I believe this is tied to #4 above. Because there is this real fear of failure, whether it’s failing God or His people, insecurity has a way of creeping into the man of God’s life. Moses would be a prime example of this. God called him to a task that he didn’t think he could fulfill, and so with a fear of failure he expressed his insecurities to God.
6. “We face the same temptations and occasional spiritual dryness as everyone else. This means we need accountability, but are often afraid to seek it.” The prayers of God’s people help during these times of dryness. I think it often is acutely obvious to both pastor and people when this is going on. And when it is, the people of God praying for the man of God can help overcome this.
7. “Our spouse is sometimes the loneliest person in the church and often feels extreme pressure to live up to unrealistic expectations.” While I can’t speak directly to this having never been the “spouse of a pastor” I do know the pressures are real. I’m grateful to serve a people who have placed no expectations on my wife other than to be my wife and the mother of our kids!
8. “Loneliness can exist for all leaders and many pastors suffer from it.” In my own discussions with other pastors I believe this is true though we seldom own up to it. Many pastors have this real fear of showing any weakness in their spiritual armor. So rather than be transparent about feelings of loneliness, pastors get used to the façade of “I’m okay, thanks for asking.”
9. “We seldom know who we can trust, which is why we become guarded and appear hard to get to know. Most senior pastors have been burned by someone they once trusted.” Man is this ever true. I’m thinking of a time when a staff member (at another church) betrayed my trust just weeks after arriving at our church. This lead to my best friend in the church, a man I’d spent countless hours with at his house, our house, the golf course, etc… leaving the church over this. For several years our friendship was not what it should have been, in fact it never got back to where it was.
10. “We suspect the staff, church leaders and congregation sometimes talks about us behind our back.” This is just human nature I suppose... both to suspect that folks talk about you as well as others. I know “roasted preacher” is served often around Baptist tables on Sunday … but to be honest, when pastors get together we’ve been known to eat a little “roasted layman” on occasion (grin).
Granted, Ron makes the point that not every pastor faces all 10 of these. He also rightfully expresses how we senior pastors find great joy in our work. He makes a point at the end of his post that is worth repeating word for word … here it is: “When I share any post like this, however, I have come to expect a lecture on the need to depend on Christ for these issues, which only further demonstrates my points. Senior pastors are to fully rely on Christ’s strength, as is every other believer. This is just a reminder that we happen to also be like Elijah… ‘a man just like us’.” (James 5:17)
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Dealing with doubts
Dear Church Family,
Have you ever heard something that sounded too good to be true? I’ve often responded to such things with “I’ll believe it when I see it”. An example would be these diet programs where somebody lost 200 pounds in 12 months. If you read the fine print it typically says something like “these results are not typical”. We read that stuff and doubt that it’s true. When it comes to faith and doubting in the life of the Christian, I think we all fall into one of three categories.
There are what I call the “casual believers”. They believe there is a God but they have not surrendered their life to Him. They are the Christmas, Easter believers and attenders. Then there are the “convenient believers”. They will follow Christ as long as it’s convenient. But the first time His claims of Lordship interfere with their plans, they are gone. It’s as if they leverage faith to their benefit. Finally, some are among the “committed believers”. They understand what Paul meant in Galatians 2 when He said he’d been “crucified with Christ”; for them it really is all about Him.
In John 20 we find the disciple named Thomas doubting the resurrection of the Lord. It’s not that he didn’t want to believe, he just needed to see proof before he would or could believe. So maybe you are like Thomas and struggling with doubts, what should you do? Before we look at the answer to that question let me differentiate between doubts and unbelief. Doubt literally means to be undecided or wavering between two opinions. But unbelief is a conscious decision I believe to not believe; to stand against the truth.
To deal with our doubts, first, I think we have to acknowledge the fact we have doubts. Some simply try to ignore them or pretend they aren’t there but that usually will not be sufficient for long. There are various causes or reasons we doubt. For some its intellectualism; they intellectually struggle with what they’ve been taught or believe to be true. For others its emotionalism that produces doubt. They base their faith on their feelings and when their mountain top experiences depart, so does their faith.
Secondly, after admitting our struggles with doubts, we need to turn to God for help. Have you ever considered how many “doubters” there are in the bible? Abraham and Sarah doubted the promise of a child. Moses doubted he was the right man for the job of going to Pharaoh. How many times in the gospels do we read of Jesus saying to the disciples, “Oh ye of little faith”? When we doubt the best thing we can do is be honest with God and bring our doubts to Him.
Back to John 20. Jesus could have busted on Thomas for doubting. He could have said, “I spend 3 years with you and at the first sign of real trouble you doubt?” Jesus doesn’t shame him though, He doesn’t condemn him, He simply meets him where he’s at and comforts him. Maybe what you don’t know is “doubting Thomas” became an incredible Christian taking the gospel to India and ultimately dying a martyrs death for the sake of the gospel. I’m not saying that your doubting could end up in your death for the gospel. But what I want you to see is when you give your doubts to the Lord, maybe it’s not dying for the sake of the gospel but rather living for the sake of the gospel that He calls you to. Something to ponder.
Have you ever heard something that sounded too good to be true? I’ve often responded to such things with “I’ll believe it when I see it”. An example would be these diet programs where somebody lost 200 pounds in 12 months. If you read the fine print it typically says something like “these results are not typical”. We read that stuff and doubt that it’s true. When it comes to faith and doubting in the life of the Christian, I think we all fall into one of three categories.
There are what I call the “casual believers”. They believe there is a God but they have not surrendered their life to Him. They are the Christmas, Easter believers and attenders. Then there are the “convenient believers”. They will follow Christ as long as it’s convenient. But the first time His claims of Lordship interfere with their plans, they are gone. It’s as if they leverage faith to their benefit. Finally, some are among the “committed believers”. They understand what Paul meant in Galatians 2 when He said he’d been “crucified with Christ”; for them it really is all about Him.
In John 20 we find the disciple named Thomas doubting the resurrection of the Lord. It’s not that he didn’t want to believe, he just needed to see proof before he would or could believe. So maybe you are like Thomas and struggling with doubts, what should you do? Before we look at the answer to that question let me differentiate between doubts and unbelief. Doubt literally means to be undecided or wavering between two opinions. But unbelief is a conscious decision I believe to not believe; to stand against the truth.
To deal with our doubts, first, I think we have to acknowledge the fact we have doubts. Some simply try to ignore them or pretend they aren’t there but that usually will not be sufficient for long. There are various causes or reasons we doubt. For some its intellectualism; they intellectually struggle with what they’ve been taught or believe to be true. For others its emotionalism that produces doubt. They base their faith on their feelings and when their mountain top experiences depart, so does their faith.
Secondly, after admitting our struggles with doubts, we need to turn to God for help. Have you ever considered how many “doubters” there are in the bible? Abraham and Sarah doubted the promise of a child. Moses doubted he was the right man for the job of going to Pharaoh. How many times in the gospels do we read of Jesus saying to the disciples, “Oh ye of little faith”? When we doubt the best thing we can do is be honest with God and bring our doubts to Him.
Back to John 20. Jesus could have busted on Thomas for doubting. He could have said, “I spend 3 years with you and at the first sign of real trouble you doubt?” Jesus doesn’t shame him though, He doesn’t condemn him, He simply meets him where he’s at and comforts him. Maybe what you don’t know is “doubting Thomas” became an incredible Christian taking the gospel to India and ultimately dying a martyrs death for the sake of the gospel. I’m not saying that your doubting could end up in your death for the gospel. But what I want you to see is when you give your doubts to the Lord, maybe it’s not dying for the sake of the gospel but rather living for the sake of the gospel that He calls you to. Something to ponder.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
It's not over
Easter Sunday is a reminder to us that it’s not “over”. For some of you reading this I know life is difficult and maybe you feel like you have nowhere to turn, but the fact that you are here reading this is proof that it’s “not over” for you.
In January 2010, Jozef Guzy then 76, a Polish beekeeper had an experience where folks wrongly assumed it was “over” for him. It seems as though he was stung multiple times by his bees and his body went into shock. It was then wrongly assumed that had suffered a heart attack and doctor’s pronounced Jozef dead. Imagine the shock he felt when he awoke locked inside a coffin at a funeral home. Undertaker Darius Charon said, “He was shouting and banging on the coffin … he made enough noise to raise the dead so we couldn't miss him.” They wrongly assumed for Josef Guzy that it was over. Now go back 2000 years to another time and place. As Jesus was removed from the cross and placed in the tomb, followers and critics alike wrongly assumed it was over. Yes, Jesus had died, but it was far from over.
How can we know that Jesus really rose from the dead? I think there are three indisputable sources that serve as evidence of His resurrection.
1. The resurrection was communicated by the angels – As the women arrive to “prepare the body” of Jesus they are greeted by angels, God’s messengers, and are asked why they seek the living among the dead.
2. The resurrection was confirmed by His absence – His tomb was sealed with a large stone and Roman guards were put outside to guard the tomb against His disciples stealing the body and then claiming He arose from the dead. One of the greatest proofs of the resurrection is the fact no one ever produced the corpse of Jesus.
3. The resurrection was certified by His appearances – One might argue that an angel appearance or lack of body is not proof that Jesus arose. But the fact that on multiple occasions and to upwards of 500 people Jesus appeared after His resurrection makes for a compelling argument. If it was a hoax, 2-3 people might try and pull it off but 500? And we know many of those 500 died horribly cruel deaths for believing and affirming that Jesus rose from the dead.
So what does the resurrection mean to you and me? I think we learn 2 very important lessons from this.
1. We know Jesus was more than just a man – One Easter the Wizard of Id comic strip had one ant climbing up the cross to read the sign above Jesus head. Another asked him what it said and he responded, “It says ‘to be continued’”. Without an empty tomb, the cross would lose its meaning.
2. We know we can be forgiven – We all face two major problems: sin and death. Jesus dealt with both of those problems so that we wouldn’t have to. The cross pays for our sin (Hebrews 9:27).
3. We know that death is not the end – The resurrection proves there is life after death.
Pilate offered the Jews on that fateful day to either release Jesus or a notorious criminal named Barabbas. Pilate wrongly assumed it was a no brainer and given the choice they’d choose to release Jesus. But the crowd instead told him to crucify Jesus and give them Barabbas. Imagine being Barabbas in the jail cell. He obviously heard a great commotion and then hears the people start to chant his name. He doesn’t know why they are calling his name but thinks they must be calling for his head. Then he hears the keys rattle in the jail cell door and with trembling knees and faint heart he’s told he’s being taken to Pilate. Once before Pilate, Pilate tells him, “You know you deserve death.” Then after a long pause Pilate exclaims, “You are free to go, this man (pointing at Jesus) is taking your place!”
Now substitute your name for Barabbas. One day the keys of death will rattle at your life’s door. Maybe you are at first frightened by the prospect. You know that you have sinned throughout your life and you deserve whatever comes your way. Then you appear for the Lord God the Righteous Judge and with great trepidation you await your just punishment. But then the Father welcomes you to heaven pointing at His Son and exclaiming “He took your place!” That is true when you know Christ as your Savior. It’s not “over” … the fact you are here shows there’s still time for you to come to Christ!
In January 2010, Jozef Guzy then 76, a Polish beekeeper had an experience where folks wrongly assumed it was “over” for him. It seems as though he was stung multiple times by his bees and his body went into shock. It was then wrongly assumed that had suffered a heart attack and doctor’s pronounced Jozef dead. Imagine the shock he felt when he awoke locked inside a coffin at a funeral home. Undertaker Darius Charon said, “He was shouting and banging on the coffin … he made enough noise to raise the dead so we couldn't miss him.” They wrongly assumed for Josef Guzy that it was over. Now go back 2000 years to another time and place. As Jesus was removed from the cross and placed in the tomb, followers and critics alike wrongly assumed it was over. Yes, Jesus had died, but it was far from over.
How can we know that Jesus really rose from the dead? I think there are three indisputable sources that serve as evidence of His resurrection.
1. The resurrection was communicated by the angels – As the women arrive to “prepare the body” of Jesus they are greeted by angels, God’s messengers, and are asked why they seek the living among the dead.
2. The resurrection was confirmed by His absence – His tomb was sealed with a large stone and Roman guards were put outside to guard the tomb against His disciples stealing the body and then claiming He arose from the dead. One of the greatest proofs of the resurrection is the fact no one ever produced the corpse of Jesus.
3. The resurrection was certified by His appearances – One might argue that an angel appearance or lack of body is not proof that Jesus arose. But the fact that on multiple occasions and to upwards of 500 people Jesus appeared after His resurrection makes for a compelling argument. If it was a hoax, 2-3 people might try and pull it off but 500? And we know many of those 500 died horribly cruel deaths for believing and affirming that Jesus rose from the dead.
So what does the resurrection mean to you and me? I think we learn 2 very important lessons from this.
1. We know Jesus was more than just a man – One Easter the Wizard of Id comic strip had one ant climbing up the cross to read the sign above Jesus head. Another asked him what it said and he responded, “It says ‘to be continued’”. Without an empty tomb, the cross would lose its meaning.
2. We know we can be forgiven – We all face two major problems: sin and death. Jesus dealt with both of those problems so that we wouldn’t have to. The cross pays for our sin (Hebrews 9:27).
3. We know that death is not the end – The resurrection proves there is life after death.
Pilate offered the Jews on that fateful day to either release Jesus or a notorious criminal named Barabbas. Pilate wrongly assumed it was a no brainer and given the choice they’d choose to release Jesus. But the crowd instead told him to crucify Jesus and give them Barabbas. Imagine being Barabbas in the jail cell. He obviously heard a great commotion and then hears the people start to chant his name. He doesn’t know why they are calling his name but thinks they must be calling for his head. Then he hears the keys rattle in the jail cell door and with trembling knees and faint heart he’s told he’s being taken to Pilate. Once before Pilate, Pilate tells him, “You know you deserve death.” Then after a long pause Pilate exclaims, “You are free to go, this man (pointing at Jesus) is taking your place!”
Now substitute your name for Barabbas. One day the keys of death will rattle at your life’s door. Maybe you are at first frightened by the prospect. You know that you have sinned throughout your life and you deserve whatever comes your way. Then you appear for the Lord God the Righteous Judge and with great trepidation you await your just punishment. But then the Father welcomes you to heaven pointing at His Son and exclaiming “He took your place!” That is true when you know Christ as your Savior. It’s not “over” … the fact you are here shows there’s still time for you to come to Christ!
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Are you lonely?
I googled the word “lonely” today and it shows 328 million hits. Gallup’s research shows that at any given moment 4 of 10 Americans are suffering from feelings of loneliness. Research shows that feelings of loneliness are not healthy. Loneliness is no respecter of persons and each person processes loneliness differently. Some turn to food or drugs, while others turn to wrong relationships. Some become work-a-holics while others become recluses. I started thinking today of all the songs written about these feelings. Whether it’s Paul McCartney asking “Where do all the lonely people come from?” or Elvis singing about the hotel at the “end of lonely street called Heartbreak Hotel”, it’s obvious these feelings abound. It was Albert Einstein that said “It is strange to be known so universally & yet to be so lonely.”
I think there are 4 types of friends. We all have “contact” friends that we say hello to when we pass in the hallway. We have “casual” friends that we share common interests with and can talk about those interests. We have those we call “close” friends that we feel we can be somewhat open with. But if we are really fortunate we have a few that we can call “committed” friends; those who will stand by your side no matter what.
Committed friendships differ from others because of a willingness to sacrifice. When you love someone this way you will sacrifice for their best interests. Friendship that’s not willing to sacrifice for the other is not much a friendship. I love the story I read a few years ago from just outside St. Louis. In April 2004, 9 year old Mak Shulist battled brain cancer. It was deemed “incurable” and it quickly robbed young Mak of his eyesight. The Make-A-Wish foundation decided they would do something for Mak and asked him what he would like. Typically kids request from them things like meeting their favorite celebrity or a trip to Disney World. But nothing prepared them for Mak’s request.
Mak attended Ellisville Elementary school even after his diagnosis. Despite receiving chemotherapy and radiation, little Mak started the 3rd grade that Fall with his friends. So when his health finally failed and the Make-A-Wish Foundation got involved, they were stunned when all Mak asked for was for them to build a rock-climbing wall at his school for his friends. Will Randall, one of his classmates said, “I thought he was going to wish that there was a medicine or something, and he just wished for that and I was like whoa, he's nice.” As Mak’s condition worsened the Foundation hurried to finish the 7 foot wall. From the time they granted his request to the time kids climbed on the wall, only 2 weeks had passed. Thursday April 9, 2004, Ellisville’s principle videotaped students climbing on the wall. Students described on the video what it was like to climb the wall. The video was rushed to Mak’s house and his parents turned the volume up high so they could be assured Mak heard it. The next day, Friday April 9, 2004 Mak died. Michael Stafford, one of Mak's friends said, “'Every time I get on this wall I will think about him and what he did for us.”
The next time you are feeling lonely, remember there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother. Remember His friendship is not extended to us because we are worthy of that kind of friendship. In spite of the way we treat Him by our propensity to willingly sin, He loves us and remains committed to His relationship with us. I’m thankful today for the friend I find in Jesus!
I think there are 4 types of friends. We all have “contact” friends that we say hello to when we pass in the hallway. We have “casual” friends that we share common interests with and can talk about those interests. We have those we call “close” friends that we feel we can be somewhat open with. But if we are really fortunate we have a few that we can call “committed” friends; those who will stand by your side no matter what.
Committed friendships differ from others because of a willingness to sacrifice. When you love someone this way you will sacrifice for their best interests. Friendship that’s not willing to sacrifice for the other is not much a friendship. I love the story I read a few years ago from just outside St. Louis. In April 2004, 9 year old Mak Shulist battled brain cancer. It was deemed “incurable” and it quickly robbed young Mak of his eyesight. The Make-A-Wish foundation decided they would do something for Mak and asked him what he would like. Typically kids request from them things like meeting their favorite celebrity or a trip to Disney World. But nothing prepared them for Mak’s request.
Mak attended Ellisville Elementary school even after his diagnosis. Despite receiving chemotherapy and radiation, little Mak started the 3rd grade that Fall with his friends. So when his health finally failed and the Make-A-Wish Foundation got involved, they were stunned when all Mak asked for was for them to build a rock-climbing wall at his school for his friends. Will Randall, one of his classmates said, “I thought he was going to wish that there was a medicine or something, and he just wished for that and I was like whoa, he's nice.” As Mak’s condition worsened the Foundation hurried to finish the 7 foot wall. From the time they granted his request to the time kids climbed on the wall, only 2 weeks had passed. Thursday April 9, 2004, Ellisville’s principle videotaped students climbing on the wall. Students described on the video what it was like to climb the wall. The video was rushed to Mak’s house and his parents turned the volume up high so they could be assured Mak heard it. The next day, Friday April 9, 2004 Mak died. Michael Stafford, one of Mak's friends said, “'Every time I get on this wall I will think about him and what he did for us.”
The next time you are feeling lonely, remember there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother. Remember His friendship is not extended to us because we are worthy of that kind of friendship. In spite of the way we treat Him by our propensity to willingly sin, He loves us and remains committed to His relationship with us. I’m thankful today for the friend I find in Jesus!
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